This is what I hear when I lay my head on Jason's Chest...just amazing...
Wednesday, October 24, 2012
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Ok, so truth be known, Im having a very emotional day. Not bad emotional, just emotional. I woke up this morning to find out that a fellow Lvader, Lorna Jarms , was now an Angel. We have lost several LVADERS this year. It saddens me so much, I can’t even put it into words. The first thing I always do is Thank God that he let my Jason live one more day. I know its hard, because on the outside Jason looks healthy, but the risk of Strokes and Blood clots are always there and things can happen with no warning at all. I couldn’t imagine my life without Jason. So for me, it’s a hard thing to carry every day, and I cant’ even imagine how it is for him. With that said, being in the LVAD life is anything but sad all the time. It is so inspirational. Do you know how many people we have helped??, just through our blog and our emails…Thousands! I got a request from mylvad.com asking me to comment on a post. There was a girl wondering whether or not she should date someone with an LVAD. Here is what I wrote back to her:
I've been in your shoes, and goodness I can relate. When I first met Jason in 2010 I knew he had CHF. At that time there was no talk of an LVAD we never even heard of it.In 2009 when they said he had CHF they gave him 3-5 at the most. I was sooo scared about the thought of dating him and even talked to a friend of mine. Ill never forget what she said. She said that If I had feelings for him not to be afraid, that I couldnt live my life in fear. If I had walked away from Jason because of fear, I would've never experienced the unconditional love that Jason and I have for one another. God lead me to Jason, and when I leave this earth Ill be grateful that God showed me what love was suppose to really be like, I found my soul mate, when I chose not to be scared. How many people can really say that?? Now, you have to be strong though, yes it is scary that anyday they could leave us, I think about that alot, I'd be lost without Jason. But I know in my heart God wants this for me,and I am so honored to share my life with Jason. In this life, there is no place I'd rather be, scared or not. Just look within yourself, God might be planning Awesomes things for you that you haven't even began to experience yet. Dont run away honey, run to him!! My email is email@example.com If you'd like to contact me that way. We also have a blog when you can check it out, it might help you.http://ourlifeourlovehislvad.blogspot.com/
So, like in any life..You have to take the joys with the sadness. When Stephanie Larson went into the hospital to receive her donor heart, after the surgery there were complications. This just broke my heart I remember calling out to Jason, explaining what was going on, I felt like crying every day, my heart just went out to her and her family, since Jason and I have been on this journey I had heard nothing but positive things. So to see this first hand It was very scary to me. I had everyone I knew praying for Stephanie, I even had alerts going to my phone every time her mom made a new post ( she did great by the way!) When she started getting better it was such a blessing!! God worked through Stephanie, he was always with her, and every single prayer was answered. Stephanie has since gone home from the hospital, and is doing wonderful. ------ So, the point of this post is Yes in LVAD life you will hasve moments of sadness, but goodness, all the miracles, the close “family” we have with the LVAD community. it is just mind blowing! To have someone tell me I’ve help them through things, that they couldn’t have gotten through things without me and that our story has been an inspiration to them…it doesn’t get any better than that…
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Yes that’s right, Jason is officially listed back on the heart transplant list as a status 1B. Of course it’s not a 1A, but hopefully we’ll get that chance on day! Jason had his first appointment last week, it had been 11 months!! Yes, there can be no doubt that God has watched over my Jason. Dr. Shah said his heart looked the same now as it did last year, I can’t complain about that. Jason was so nervous about his appointment so I was so excited everything went well. They did turn up his speed from 9600 to 10000 to give him more energy…and lordy be what a difference that made! Hopefully it will help him with his little spouts of forgetfulness too! We went to VCU/MCV on Wednesday to get a Right Heart Cath, but it ended up his INR was 1 point too high to do the procedure..ughhh better safe than sorry though I sure they know better than me. We’ll be trying again tomorrow, so Ill be going in with fingers crossed! OXOX